Since the start of the pandemic, social media has been buzzing about “getting back to normal” vs. “finding a new normal.” Many people have expressed their contempt for the term “new normal.” I’m not one of them and I’ll explain why as we examine what normal really means.
The first times I remember hearing the phrase “new normal” were after 9/11 and seven years later when I was diagnosed with breast cancer. When our country was attacked by terrorists, it became clear our world was forever changed. There would be no going back to booking last minute flights or complaining about airport security lines. Privacy or what we believed were our rights to privacy would be different. Gradually, we settled into a new rhythm and most of us have become accustomed to the new rules for air travel.
During my chemotherapy, my nurses were wonderful. They talked to me about the huge changes a cancer diagnosis brings to individuals and families and finding “a new normal.” Any serious illness or injury can be life changing even if you make a full recovery. Physically, your body undergoes changes… sometimes you are left with visible scars… sometimes the scars are emotional… often you must deal with both. While you are battling, your family is often relegated to the side lines trapped and frustrated because they can’t be sick for you and they can’t fight this battle for you. They may be scared or angry and afraid to show these emotions. I felt like I was letting my sons down by getting sick, so I did everything I could to keep our household running like “normal.”
There’s absolutely nothing normal about cancer, yet you fall into a treatment schedule quite easily. You learn when to rest, when to exercise, and what to eat to stay strong. In a strange way, it all becomes a normal part of “your” life. When treatment ends you feel a bit lost. It’s not that you want to keep pumping poison into your veins, or you want to be bombarded with radiation. Treatment becomes your safety net against illness. Did you plan your life around your treatments or your treatments around your life? Either way you allow the treatments to become a normal part of your life and when they are over you must find a way back to normal. It won’t be the life you had before because your future holds check-ups, routine bloodwork, and scans. There will always be that nagging tiny fear that your cancer will return, but I’m living proof there is life after cancer. It won’t be the same life. You and your family members will always worry about a reoccurrence. On the positive side, you and your loved ones may become closer and learn to cherish your time together. You may stop trying to micromanage every aspect of your life and start to enjoy being alive. Food might taste better, exercise might become more important, and the beauty of a sunrise or a sunset might take your breath away like it did when you were a child and life was full of wonder and possibilities.
In a post-pandemic world, we may still need to wear masks in large crowds. Hand washing is something that will (and shouldn’t) ever go away. We might shake hands less, but I hope we hug more even if we instinctively hold our breath and reach for the hand sanitizer afterward. The way we shop and the way we work and learn will be different. It will take time for people to feel comfortable going to sit-down restaurants, bars, movie theaters, and concerts. Our cell phones, workbooks, and laptops will continue to be part of our daily lives in ever increasing ways. I don’t know when we will feel completely comfortable traveling and staying in hotels again.
I hope we all realize how important access to healthcare is and we begin to address those health problems we accepted and lived with until COVID-19 reminded us getting sick when you have an underlying condition can be deadly.
Wear your masks, get fully vaccinated, keep washing your hands, and follow the CDC guidelines (or the medical authority in your country) about social distancing, crowds and family or public get-togethers.
Our lives will never be the same, but they are precious, and we must never forget over three million people worldwide have died of COVID-19 and there will be more unless we all do our part to help end the pandemic.
So yes, the term “new normal” might annoy you, but life is always changing and normal changes with it.